February 1, 2016
It has been exactly 17 months today.
I didn’t expect to still be here. There are times when I ask myself, ”When is the right time? How does one know when to stop?” But then I’d switch to, “No. You ain’t a quitter so don’t bother.” It’s a cycle I can never get myself out of. It’s a game where all you can do is hope, pray, and wait. It is a painful, exhausting game. It’s a game where you kill yourself slowly while savoring every second of it.
I have invested so much on this, but it got me too tired and bankrupt. Nothing much is left of me, so I’m acting on it now before I my ammo goes zero. This will be my last cry. Don’t worry; I didn’t write to invite you to join me and to help me in this game. I wrote to tell you that I am using my last bullet to tell everyone that I lost, and that I am done.