In less than two months, as part of the tradition for Thomasian graduating students, I’ll be exiting the Arch of the Centuries. In less than two months, I’ll be wearing the Thomasian nurses’ gala uniform under my toga. In less than two months, I’ll be stepping on the newly built UST Sports Complex to claim my diploma. It’s pleasing to hear that on March 30, 2012, finally after ten semesters, I will be graduating. Graduation, for me, is both an ending and a beginning. An ending because it ends my journey of being a typical student in school. After graduation, no more 7AM class, terror professors, happy-go-lucky classmates as well as GC classmates, bladder breaks and so on. On the other hand, graduation is a beginning. It begins my journey of being a student of life. Ooops. Wait. Wait. Wait. I’ll stop here. This seems like a graduation speech already. My graduation speech will be posted of course on March or early April. You read that right. Yes, I will be making my graduation speech. Who says only the Valedictorian can make a speech?
Oh well. This post should be about my rants regarding what will happen to me after graduation. First of all, am I really ready to graduate? I guess not. I am not yet ready to let go of the student life I’ve had for the past sixteen years of my life because… Well, I really do not know. (Did I compute it right? I started schooling at the age of three. Now I’m nineteen so that’s sixteen years of school. Okay, enough with math.) With that said, I guess I’m not yet ready to leave school. I do not know if I’m really not ready to leave school because I’m not ready holistically or I’m actually ready but I’m just in denial because I’m afraid to face the life after graduation. I do now know what lies ahead after March 30, 2012. Well, I’ll be reviewing for board exams ’till June 2, 2012 then I’ll be taking the board exam on June 30-July 31, 2012. Then maybe after a month, the results will be released. After that, hmmm… Okay, I do not know what’s next. I want to continue to graduate school but I do not have yet the money to send myself to school. If I’ll work, it would take me n number of years just to earn money for schooling. We all know that our country does not give “just” compensation for the work done by nurses. I don’t want to go abroad. That is more scary. I also would like to enroll myself in a computer school to fulfill my desire of being married to computers. But again, I do not have money. I wouldn’t like to ask my parents anymore to send me again to school. Sixteen years of expensive education is enough. I should be the one giving them back what they deserve after those sixteen long years.
I’m in doubt. I’m nervous. I’m worried. I’m scared. With all these things said, I will be ending this post with a deep sigh and a worried face.